Category Archives: Uncategorized

I’ll Make this Brief

Photo by rawpixel.com from Pexels

An alternative title could have been: Oops, I did it again. Did what you may ask? Left this to the last minute.

I love deadlines. I love the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.

Douglas Adams

My mind is all jittery at the moment. I am trying to do about three things at once and thinking about the things I am not doing. I have been in work today (Saturday) and we were busy. So much to do in work and a mind all a jumble. It is confusing and distracting. The mind needs to be quiet. The mind needs to be quiet.

https://www.pexels.com/photo/fashion-woman-notebook-pen-34072/

I want to write but what? So many projects like a sculptor chipping away at several stone tablets – but adding new ones too. In an endless cycle of unfinished work. I want to yell stop. So my head stops spinning. I want to exist outside of time and get things organised. So I can exercise and otherwise improve myself, so I can get stuff done. Time marches on though and pushes me with it. All I can do is try to work things out. I am crumbling a little at the moment – but little things help. Such as a co-worker asking how I am doing because she is experiencing some of the same and understands. That is something that helps.

I just wanted to say that I have checked this post. I really have. Unfortunately my particular combination of dyslexia and dyspraxia makes it really hard for me to spot typos. Please enjoy and I’ll try not to make too many errors.  

I have a Patreon page. I hope you will consider supporting this blog: https://www.patreon.com/unstableorbit

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Seduction

Photo by Tyler Lastovich from Pexels

I bought an iphone. I had it for about two days. Got it at about 1800 on Monday. I had returned it by 1000 on Wednesday. I was seduced by the idea of the iphone. They are very shinny.

Photo by Toni Cuenca from Pexels

If you love Apple products then that is great. I am not writing this to criticise anyone’s choices. I have an ipad which I am happy with – even that though might have been bought owing to a lack of imagination on my part.

Photo by Josh Sorenson from Pexels

I didn’t buy the iPad on a whim I spend some time considering. I knew I wanted a tablet computer and the only options seemed to be Samsung and iPads. Since the reason I was making the purchase was because my Samsung phone was having some issues an iPad seemed logical. There were, it turned out, other options they just weren’t immediately apparent to me. I am a bit dim when it comes to technology. So an iPad it was and it was expensive. I not convinced it is worth it but I do like it.

Photo by rawpixel.com from Pexels

When my poor little Samsung started to show its age even more I knew I needed a new phone but which one? That choice is rather a bewildering one. There are so many options and, for my needs at least, almost anyone would do. The phone I now have is a Huawei and cost me £199 in an outright purchase. So why then did I initially get a phone that would have cost £1,224 (including minutes, texts and data) over three years?

https://www.pexels.com/photo/silver-iphone-6-50684/

I have no idea. Well maybe not no idea. iphones are smart – some might even say sexy. Then the slippy slope of bad decisions started. First I thought about a second hand iphone, then I thought about an older model but bought new, then I settled on an iphone 8 – which is also an older model but not as old. That is how the slope works. Each step seems reasonable just like ordering the large instead of the regular at a cafe – only a little more.

Photo by Fancycrave.com from Pexels

The thing of it is I don’t know what happened. As I was going into town to buy a phone I said: ‘I don’t need one with all the bells and whistles.’ and yet came home with an overly priced phone. Maybe this is a serious sign of a complete lack of self control on my part and that might be something I need to address.

https://www.pexels.com/photo/new-year-s-eve-december-31-fireworks-new-year-10967/

Actually there is no maybe about it. For now though I can celebrate I dodged a bullet and was able to exchange the phone without fuss. Only spending £199 on a phone eliminates the worry. I could almost afford to replace it every month if I needed to – rather than it costing nearly a month’s earnings to do the same with an iPhone.

I write this post as a cautionary tale for any purchase you might make. My Huawei does all that I need. It might not be as special by some metrics but it does the job and, at the end of the day, that is the important thing.

I just wanted to say that I have checked this post. I really have. Unfortunately my particular combination of dyslexia and dyspraxia makes it really hard for me to spot typos. Please enjoy and I’ll try not to make too many errors.  

I have a Patreon page. I hope you will consider supporting this blog: https://www.patreon.com/unstableorbit

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The Untitled Blog Post

A great song by my favourite artist.

It is Sunday. Once again I am writing this in the eleventh hour; actually I have eight hours until you will read this. I wanted to share this song with you a song I think I have shared it before.

https://www.pexels.com/photo/white-bed-comforter-212269/

I had trouble getting out of bed this morning. Maybe I was just tired but I was too alert to go back to sleep and too sleepy to get up. This happens to me sometimes. On a work day I can force myself to get out of bed – in that case other people are relying on me and I need to be somewhere. When it is just me though it is easy to just stay in bed.

I haven’t listened to this one in years but it was in my mind this morning.

So I was in bed. I looked at some YouTube videos I wasn’t really interested in and wished I was getting up. Does this happen to anyone else here? That you really want to do something but some how you just can’t make your body do it? In the end it took about two hours and even now I am still feeling groggy maybe the morning isn’t the best time for me.

Sometimes they play this song in work…on Sunday! Now isn’t that ironic?

I want to be a morning person. I have spoken here before about getting up at 0500 and the days when I have have been productive. However they are also days when I don’t get enough sleep. My grogginess is nothing to do with sleep, not that I am a doctor of course, but I have felt more alert on days of six hours of sleep than on some days of nine.

Rushing around indeed, Dido

The problem is I seem to be neither a morning or an evening person. I would love to do an experiment of what times I would do things if I didn’t know about time. It would mean having another person around to record what time it was.

Not really relevant but I am talking about time. (Plus this episode is excellent.)

With work we all have to fit in to the idea of mornings being the beginning. Now that is a weird turn of phrase but it is true. The stereotypical job begins at 0900 but some people don’t really feel like they’re capable of doing anything till later in the day. Perhaps it is because I work shifts but I have not yet figured out my best time to get my stuff done.

Yeah. Pretty much.

I have got some of my stuff done this week but there is still so much more to do. And without access to a time machine it won’t be possible. There are so few hours and so many more distractions. I am also the king of procrastination and sometimes even when I have been productive I am not happy about what I have done but annoyed at what I haven’t done. And… you have probably guessed it the gym was one of the things that didn’t happen this week.

I can’t wait to watch this with my nephew.

When I am feeling uncertain, sad, worried, lonely, concerned, or just thinking of a future that may never be there is always nostalgia. Watching a show you know well can be helpful because you know how it ends. I may not manage to figure life out, I may not get published, I may not have reciprocal love but International Rescue will always save the day.

Whoever you’ve been today; happy, sad, lonely, worried, tired, or energetic I hope you’ve have an excellent day and that your Monday isn’t too manic.

***
I just wanted to say that I have checked this post. I really have. Unfortunately my particular combination of dyslexia and dyspraxia makes it really hard for me to spot typos. Please enjoy and I’ll try not to make too many errors.  

I have a Patreon page. I hope you will consider supporting this blog: https://www.patreon.com/unstableorbit

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Seven Random Thoughts because I Ran out of Time this Week

Cannot run out of time. There is infinite time. You are finite. Zathras is finite.

1. Infinity is a relative concept. This may not be true in a literal sense – I’m a writer not a philosopher. I was changing my mobile tariff today. It comes with unlimited text and unlimited calls. The data was not unlimited but since it is more than I have ever used in a month it might as well be.

2. A treat is only a treat if it is rare. I used to enjoy having a Chai latte when I came into town. Now so that I have been living in town for a while, and the coffee shop is fifteen minutes away, it has ceased to be special. It is probably why Cadbury’s, so the story goes, didn’t mind staff eating chocolate from their production line. They knew they would be tired of it sooner or later.

3. My leg has gone to sleep so I am writing this one between steps.

4. Brexit is a complete mess isn’t it? It is almost like watching an unfolding soap opera. Since I have foolishly brought up the subject I am on the side of remain. Hopefully we will have a conclusion one way or the other soon.

5. I am in the park and have found a rock to sit on. There are stones surrounding it and I am wondering how old this arrangement is. There is never a sign around when you want one.

6. The park is nice today. The sun is going down and the people are spread out so it is quiet. I like the quiet. The only thing that would make it better is if it was warmer. Maybe I am sitting too much in the shadows. I see a patch of sun. Let’s go and take a look.

7. I like summer and it feels like it is nearly here. I hope it is a good warm one. It will be nice to go to the park and the beach in glorious weather.

Blogging while walking is nice. It still feels relaxing even if I am holding a computer. I still have almost 2500 steps till I make my target so a bit more walking is in order. First though I am going to sit by those trees and schedule this post. See you next time.

***
I just wanted to say that I have checked this post. I really have. Unfortunately my particular combination of dyslexia and dyspraxia makes it really hard for me to spot typos. Please enjoy and I’ll try not to make too many errors.  

I have a Patreon page. I hope you will consider supporting this blog: https://www.patreon.com/unstableorbit

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Order and Chaos

Imposing your type of order…may prove difficult…

Odo (Star Trek: Deep Space Nine – The Search)

I like the idea of having order in my life. That idea never seems to come to fruition which is down to my complete in ability to organise. It is not for lack of trying.

Kat Jayne – Pexels

I impose order on myself with my to-do list. I have discussed this here many times. Having that helps me keep track of what I want. It is true that each day I get stuff done so in one respect it works. However my brain likes to be contrary and focus on what wasn’t done rather than what was.

https://www.pexels.com/photo/food-salad-healthy-red-35613/

I use the pomodoro technique – or a bastardisation of said technique. Some of the tasks don’t take the traditional 25 minutes so I tend to set the timer for longer and move between tasks. I sometimes wonder what it would be like to wake up one day without a timer and without a to-do list. To me it would feel like climbing without a safety harness.

I’d be lost at sea. Adrift

James Bond (Tomorrow Never Dies)

Duolingo, Calm, and Headspace would all be done. They all keep a record of your streak and have a definitive end point. The end point for a book is the end of the novel and I can’t sit and read for 20 hours in one day.

Order verse chaos. Choose one.

The Shadows (Babylon 5: Into The Fire)

In Babylon 5 the characters had to find there way between the two extremes of order and chaos. That is the struggle I am trying to deal with and have been for so long. With order things get done but I am locked into the plan. With chaos things may still get done but I do not have that feeling at the end of the day that I have done enough. In actuality I don’t have that feeling anyway as my targets are too high.

Photo by Min An from Pexels

They say ‘shoot for the moon’ and that if you miss you will still be amongst the stars. It is a colourful metaphor and aiming high is certainly good advice but I am going to leave you with some wise words.

I’m no writer, but if I were, it seems to me that I’d want to poke my head up once in a while and take a look around… see what’s going on.

Captain Sisko (Star Trek: Deep Space Nine – The Visitor)

The sad thing is it isn’t even writing that is engrossing me.

***
I just wanted to say that I have checked this post. I really have. Unfortunately my particular combination of dyslexia and dyspraxia makes it really hard for me to spot typos. Please enjoy and I’ll try not to make too many errors.  

I have a Patreon page. I hope you will consider supporting this blog: https://www.patreon.com/unstableorbit

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Assimilation

https://www.pexels.com/photo/access-adult-blur-business-261628/

A few days ago… well I say ‘a few days’ it might have been a week… actually more than a week… let me start again… I went out without my mobile!

https://www.pexels.com/photo/trees-grass-lawn-park-2336/

In today’s world this is a weird thing not to have this device with you. I would like to segue to another topic for a second if you’ll indulge me.

https://www.pexels.com/photo/cigar-cigarette-smoke-macro-70088/

Now and then, when I am out and about, a smoker will ask me if I have a lighter on me or a cigarette. I don’t smoke and I don’t often find the need to start a fire. What I find curious is that these people managed to forget either of these items. We often talk of technology as an addiction but it is not a literal one, at least not for most people, and yet I don’t think I have ever forgotten my phone. So I find it curious that someone with a literal addiction could forget. Then again it might not be a good comparison as I am someone who has to check his pockets, that the hob is off, that the fridge and freezer are shut, that the towel rack is off, and that the door is locked before leaving so I would be unlikely to miss anything.

Photo by Jiarong Deng from Pexels

Leaving the phone at home deliberately was an interesting experience. I realised how often I reach for it. Even while walking I will look at it just while waiting for the lights to change. I missed and didn’t miss it all at once. One thing that was weird about was not having it to take notes when an idea occurred to me. I have no idea what that idea was. I heard someone say recently that we are cyborgs – we just don’t have the tech inside us.

https://www.pexels.com/photo/adult-art-beautiful-beauty-235488/

Comic con was in town this weekend. I went along on Saturday. I discovered something interesting. This crowd of people didn’t bother me not like other crowds. Think I know why… these are my people.

https://www.pexels.com/photo/ball-shaped-circle-close-up-dark-414860/

In a place like comic con I am one of them. Normal might be too strong a word but I know that everyone in that place likes some element of fantasy or scifi. I’d also imagine that a lot of them have been teased or worse for those tastes. There is a sense of camaraderie.

In that place I can say I have a small fleet of model starships and not worry about a negative response. Were I able to start a conversation with a stranger the reaction would be positive. In that crowd I am still a short, overweight, long-haired man but everyone around me is fascinated by the same sorts of things that I am. For some reason I still care what others think even when I know they are probably not thinking them at all and when I ware my swagman hat then only thing that happens, and mostly it is nothing, is someone sings a few bars or the Indiana Jones theme!

***
I just wanted to say that I have checked this post. I really have. Unfortunately my particular combination of dyslexia and dyspraxia makes it really hard for me to spot typos. Please enjoy and I’ll try not to make too many errors.  

I have a Patreon page. I hope you will consider supporting this blog: https://www.patreon.com/unstableorbit

Leave a comment

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February

https://www.pexels.com/photo/love-celebrate-valentine-happy-valentine-47396/

February ended three days ago. It already feels to me like this year is going quickly. They say that that is a common phenomenon as you get older. It has to do with a year and how it relates to a percentage of life. Which is why as children those 24 days of December always felt so long.

I made a quiet resolution to myself at the beginning of the year to try and do something significant every month – or to be more accurate 12 somethings over the course of a year. So far I can’t say that I have done that. I have switched back to using a note book and really using it and I think that that is going to help. Apps are not so good, in my opinion with helping with productivity. Too many times I find I need a feature it just doesn’t have – pen and paper can do it all.

Photo by Muffin from Pexels

I did have pizza the other day. That is, in a weird way, an achievement. You probably think I am clutching at straws, in a way I am, but let me tell you what I mean. I just wanted to go for a pizza and so I did. I made no attempt to justify it and I actually felt okay in a Pizza Hut alone.

Photo by Scott Webb from Pexels

That said I probably need to justify it given that I only went to the gym three times last month. I have no idea what is a reasonable amount of times to go; both in terms of getting my money’s worth and for it to be effective. It is certainly more that three though.

As I write this it is 0548 on Friday. I have an early shift today but I like the quite of this time of the morning. It makes me feel relaxed and getting to do something before work is a nice feeling indeed.

I hope you have all had an amazing day. See you next time.

***
I just wanted to say that I have checked this post. I really have. Unfortunately my particular combination of dyslexia and dyspraxia makes it really hard for me to spot typos. Please enjoy and I’ll try not to make too many errors.  

I have a Patreon page. I hope you will consider supporting this blog: https://www.patreon.com/unstableorbit

Leave a comment

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