Adulthood

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It is an often repeated cliche that in adulthood our rewards to ourselves are our punishments as children. I would hazard a guess that every child has said something of this sort:

“When I grow up I am going to eat fries everyday and stay up all night!”

Then you become a grown up and what do you want? A healthy dinner and an early night. I fail on both accounts!

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I live within a literal stone’s throw from a kebab place, well maybe not me throwing since I have the athleticism of a dead weasel – certainly you wouldn’t need a trebuchet – maybe one of those dog ball things. Anyway getting that kind of food is very easy – and that is not even counting getting food delivered. Even when I cook I don’t tend to cook the food that is best for me.

And when it comes to going to bed on time… well that is bad too…

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I never go to bed at a good time. Most nights I get six hours of sleep. This morning (Saturday) I have had coffee as I am feeling so tired. When I went to bed last night there was 6 hours and 59 minutes till my alarm would beep – apparently it was not enough time!

It is funny though that to be healthy we’re supposed to spend a third of our lives unconscious! I tend to view sleep as necessary evil! Going to bed when my to-do list still has stuff on feels…

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Alright it is not entirely the to-do list! What tends to happen is that I get my stuff done until I feel too tired – then I meander around on line until I end up going to bed too late!

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Of course sometimes the human body doesn’t know what it wants. On these days of six hours of sleep it is clear it is not enough – but then when I don’t have an alarm set I still tend to wake up after that amount of time! As happened today. (It is now Sunday.)

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The key is self discipline, well duh, and being able to switch off and unplug. Which is always a hard thing to do. I think that living alone makes it harder. If you are sitting with a partner or housemate and both yawning one of you might suggest it is time for sleep. However sitting alone at the computer it is all too easy just to watch one more video…

I think too that there is something in the silence that is scary – which is odd because I also feel overwhelmed on the phone all day. So that is my challenge to try and switch off – I do not have high hopes. See you next week.

I just wanted to say that I have checked this post. I really have. Unfortunately my particular combination of dyslexia and dyspraxia makes it really hard for me to spot typos. Please enjoy and I’ll try not to make too many errors.

I have a Patreon page. I hope you will consider supporting this blog: https://www.patreon.com/unstableorbit

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A Bat is not a Rodent

Taxonomic nomenclature can be an interesting topic. I always assumed that a bat was was a rodent. After all they are small fury creatures and, aside from the wings, they do look kind of like mice. Now that I have started this blog post with that assertion I feel a bit silly making it in the first place but this is the one I am going with.

https://www.pexels.com/photo/photo-of-3-capybara-standing-near-wooden-branch-and-grass-160583/

In one of my myriad of ideas, that may not pan out, was of a Rodent Federation. All these species are there and they perform various functions. Phillip Pullman had armoured bears – I want armoured Capybara!

https://www.pexels.com/photo/brown-hamster-eating-a-green-leaf-50572/

The idea started life with a young woman discovering her pet guinea pig can talk. The guinea pig becomes her go between to a magical world. This was an idea that came to me when I was…younger. I say it that way because I honestly don’t remember how young.

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If I ever finish that novel the guinea pig, Lenonn, will no longer feature – and yes he was named after a rather minor Babylon 5 character! That plot point didn’t really work for me. That sentence would be far more convincing if the novel in question was done – but no it is caught up in endless redrafting.

Nevertheless with writing very little is wasted. Ideas that can’t be used in one place can be slotted into another – and when researching you can find that the assumption you though you knew was wrong – so no bats are not rodents – the next question is what distinguishes a rodent from other mammals?

I just wanted to say that I have checked this post. I really have. Unfortunately my particular combination of dyslexia and dyspraxia makes it really hard for me to spot typos. Please enjoy and I’ll try not to make too many errors.

I have a Patreon page. I hope you will consider supporting this blog: https://www.patreon.com/unstableorbit

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Draft

There are some draft blog posts here that may never see the light of day. They are ideas that might never pan out. That is a consequence of writing.

In the past a discarded draft might be a piece of paper tossed on the fire. Now it is on the computer for ever!

https://www.pexels.com/photo/bonfire-burning-burnt-campfire-266604/

I was going to tell you about a strange thing that happened to me this week – and then I wasn’t sure if I should tell you – or if I did what words to use. Maybe I will just say the tantalising headline: I was accused of cheating by a woman I wasn’t dating. That’s a new kind of weird!

Drafts are a part of the writing life and it can get so confusing. Sometimes I know I have written a particular part of the story but I don’t remember which draft it is in – and finding it takes longer than a simple rewrite would!

And in the age of the internet there is always the distraction of the phone. My phone is in front of me now. I keep checking it even though I know I don’t need to check it that often but I do. Turning off the tech is hard – we are always afraid of missing something – even if it will be missed only for a moment.

Is the lonely silence the reason for checking? I live alone and at the back of a house. I can’t even hear the road at the moment. So does the checking of messages make us feel less lonely? That could be it.

I have sometimes imagined that if I were to have a relationship my phone would be off – if the most important person is with you then who else do you need to talk to?

Now if you’ll excuse me I am going to spend money on a takeaway – even though I had pizza Friday night!

I will cook one of these days…honest.

I just wanted to say that I have checked this post. I really have. Unfortunately my particular combination of dyslexia and dyspraxia makes it really hard for me to spot typos. Please enjoy and I’ll try not to make too many errors.

I have a Patreon page. I hope you will consider supporting this blog: https://www.patreon.com/unstableorbit

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Beginning

It is 0611 on Monday as I begin this post. Today is my day off but I woke up at 0500 and decided to just wake up. That is perhaps weird of me but I very rarely like the idea of having a lie in.

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Monday is often seen as the beginning of the week, in my head it is the beginning of the week – my place of work says otherwise! As such it can feel like new possibilities can start. I can throw off the mistakes and the bad feelings of last week and begin again.

https://www.pexels.com/photo/person-eating-using-chopsticks-33162/

On my yesterday, and hopefully not on your yesterday, I had a takeaway (again) it was delicious but that isn’t the point. The point is that there is plenty of food in my fridge so why then would I eat out?

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Well it is always more exciting isn’t it? Maybe I am just lazy – or perhaps after I had cleaned the kitchen I didn’t feel like messing it up again!

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Ostensibly I am supposed to be dieting. That is obviously not working out – I am so frequently over my calories – why is it that the nicest foods are also the most unhealthy?

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It is probably evolution’s fault isn’t it!

I eat sometimes because of tumultuous emotions. Unfortunately eating poorly makes me bigger, which makes me unhappy, which means I eat more – you can see the problem.

I think that bad feelings do have a way of fuelling themselves.

https://www.pexels.com/photo/car-refill-transportation-gas-9796/

It is now (checking phone) Wednesday and I have about fifteen minutes before I should think about stopping doing stuff and getting ready for work! So I suppose I should come to the point.

Monday being the beginning of the week means, in the eyes of many, it is a good time to start a new thing. Oh course something new can start any day but human nature would suggest that Thursday, for example, would be an odd day for the start – I think of Thursday’s like Arthur Dent does.

The new thing I have begun is writing everyday – which is an ironic thing to say as I didn’t know that at 0611 when I started writing. Let me explain…

It is now Saturday. This post has obviously been written in little chunks but hopefully I will be able to wrestle it into some sort of order where was I? Ah yes writing…

Writing is very important to me. However I am not completely sold on the idea of calling it fun. I know I would greatly miss it if I didn’t do it – actually scratch that I cannot imagine not doing it – but it still has a vague ‘work’ feel to it.

Sometimes I don’t get around to it in a day. I get other stuff done instead, like housework, but the new plan is simple write first. Well almost first since my computer, Majal, takes a bit of time to boot so I have to at least wait for that.

My parents made me realise how important the slow build is. 500 words a day is all that is needed – I was wanting to do more and ended up doing less – little and often is the way of the future and I should have known that – and now I do.

And then it was Sunday….

Unfortunately I am less good at the ‘little’ part of that when it comes to food. Food is always tempting… he said as he grabbed a second bar of chocolate…oh well.

I just wanted to say that I have checked this post. I really have. Unfortunately my particular combination of dyslexia and dyspraxia makes it really hard for me to spot typos. Please enjoy and I’ll try not to make too many errors.

I have a Patreon page. I hope you will consider supporting this blog: https://www.patreon.com/unstableorbit

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Order

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In the television series Babylon 5 the major conflict is between order and chaos. I think that describes me to a tee – although I don’t blow up planets when things aren’t working out – not until the death ray is completed anyway.

If I am disordered I don’t know what I need to do. If I am too ordered there is little room for life.

Order has two meanings for me. The first is being controlled – having homes for everything and trying to make the place look like something other than a pigsty. Most people, I would imagine, still have a draw of chaos – I am just trying not to have a flat of chaos.

The other type of order is the order in which we do things. For example when getting home from work what is the first thing you do?

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Do you make dinner first? Do you do some house work? Do you get on with your current project?

That project could be anything from working on a novel, practising the theremin, reading a book (not really a project but let’s go with it), knitting a scarf, painting the spare room or literally anything else in someway creative.

Odds are when you get home from work you are tired – so food might be in order – on the other hand if you get stuff done first then maybe dinner will taste all the nicer knowing that the evening is yours!

I wish I could sit here and give you a one size fits all solution. I want to tell you a way to be a productivity master!

There is no such animal.

I know, deep in my brain, that all we can do is our best. Unfortunately that doesn’t help me to say well done (to myself) and try to reassure myself I have done enough. I am never that kind to myself.

I am writing this at 1752 and I am yawing – since it is my day off I could stop doing stuff now and relax but that isn’t going to happen.

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This whole thing of organisation is very well trodden ground on this blog. My head is in a spin always trying to be better. I don’t know that I will ever find that way.

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I went to the bad place yesterday. I ordered fish and chips – despite the fact that I wasn’t all that hungry and I had already used my calories. And I don’t know what annoys me more – the fact that I did it or the fact that it helped and I felt better after some comfort food. In any event I have to make sure that that doesn’t become a regular thing. The next question is what is tonight’s dinner going to be?

I hope you are all doing well. If you are troubled with hard emotions I wish you all the best with the battle! See you next time.

I just wanted to say that I have checked this post. I really have. Unfortunately my particular combination of dyslexia and dyspraxia makes it really hard for me to spot typos. Please enjoy and I’ll try not to make too many errors.

I have a Patreon page. I hope you will consider supporting this blog: https://www.patreon.com/unstableorbit

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Birthday

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Apparently I have started a new tradition here of one word titles. I rather like the simplicity of them. It also prevents me from having to be creative!

It is my brother’s birthday – or at least it is the day we are celebrating! We are going out for a meal at a place not yet confirmed and eating in a way not yet confirmed.

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Well we’re not going to be batting food at each other and catching it like seals! There will be a table and probably cutlery – but with social distancing rules we can’t just go to a restaurant like normal.

So, yes, my brother is another year older – and in about a month so will I be – now there is a scary thought!

Just a short one today. It is 1003 for me and I need to leave in 25 minutes so I better get going. See you next time.

I just wanted to say that I have checked this post. I really have. Unfortunately my particular combination of dyslexia and dyspraxia makes it really hard for me to spot typos. Please enjoy and I’ll try not to make too many errors.

I have a Patreon page. I hope you will consider supporting this blog: https://www.patreon.com/unstableorbit

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Impatient

A stock image of a close up of a bike wheal.
Photo by Jean van der Meulen from Pexels

Now that I live in a ground floor flat I can have a bike again. I have missed having a bike. It is so convenient to be able to have a faster way of getting around than walking. I wanted to buy from an actual shop – but I ended up ordering one from the internet… now why is that?

Well I have already spoiled it in the title haven’t I? I wanted a bike right away and the shops I went to were telling me it was going to be a couple of weeks – from the internet it was going to be three days – I believe it was actually two.

We often see the idea of supporting smaller businesses instead of the big ones. However there is a reason the big ones are big. They can do things more swiftly.

Picture: A blue bike resting on a stand.
Now it needs a name…

This is not a knock against small shops. On the contrary I like the idea of having local places – a shop or restaurant only exists in one place. However there are times when we need (or want) something now!

The bike I bought is by no means the dream bike. I like it though and for the price if it lasts for a year it will have been worth it.

The same bike in its folded state.
Look at the trick it can do…

The dream bike, at least at time of writing, would be a Brompton. It too is a folding bike but at five times the price – but hopefully at five times the quality. Saving for such a bike would take a very long time. For now though this is my bike and it will certainly do the job of being my commuting vehicle.

I hope you are all well and I will see you next time.

I just wanted to say that I have checked this post. I really have. Unfortunately my particular combination of dyslexia and dyspraxia makes it really hard for me to spot typos. Please enjoy and I’ll try not to make too many errors.

I have a Patreon page. I hope you will consider supporting this blog: https://www.patreon.com/unstableorbit

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Thoughts

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I spend a lot of time overthinking. This is a rather exhausting and futile experience. Sometimes I even worry about things that have reached their conclusion! That is a special kind of stupid!

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The other day a thought occurred to me…I was worried about missing my flight home…from a trip I took in March! I am home and in my normal life I never go more than a few kilometres from home – and yet here was the thought. Why?

It got me thinking do other people think this way? I have heard stories of people waking up from a dream about a looming homework deadline. They are worried for a few moments and then…. they realise they are 32, the deadline was nearly twenty years ago and they handed it in on time anyway!

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The funny thing about the mind is that we each only have our own. As such when we conceptualise an idea we don’t know if that is a common way of looking at the world or not. And if our thoughts are more on the unique side it may be difficult for others to understand.

I, for example, don’t like phones. I’m fine with calling a family member but when it comes to a company I worry. I worry about not having all necessary information to hand, being misunderstood, or not being able to say no to an offer of extended warranty!

Then again, as I said above, I worry about all manner of silliness. I sometimes worry if I am, in general, liked.

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This is not a rock I want to look under. We all know people who we just don’t like very much. We are probably that person for someone too. I know what some of my bad qualities are and I am not sure how to deal with them and I know I don’t want to talk about them.

We can’t read other people’s minds (thankfully) all we can do is accept when someone tells us something is difficult for them. Of course telling someone else about our own difficulties is another matter entirely.

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One of my idiosyncrasies is I don’t like odd angles. Not to excess, thankfully, but if I was playing a board game I would want the game board to be parallel to the table and not at an angle – I am better than I was.

What are some of your idiosyncrasies?

I just wanted to say that I have checked this post. I really have. Unfortunately my particular combination of dyslexia and dyspraxia makes it really hard for me to spot typos. Please enjoy and I’ll try not to make too many errors.

I have a Patreon page. I hope you will consider supporting this blog: https://www.patreon.com/unstableorbit

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The Corbomite Maneuver (TOS) Review

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The episode starts with the Enterprise encountering an unknown object – a spinning colourful cube that blocks their path. On the bridge, in addition Spock, Sulu, and Uhura, is Lieutenant Bailey. Bailey is shown to be very green and is less prepared to deal with the stresses of the unknown than the other characters. He provides an excellent counterpoint to the calmness displayed by the others.

Raising my voice back there doesn’t mean I was scared or couldn’t do my job. It means I happen to have a human thing called an adrenaline gland.

Hmm. It does sound most inconvenient, however. Have you considered having it removed?

Very funny.

You try to cross brains with Spock, he’ll cut you to pieces every time.

Bailey, Spock and Sulu. (Star Trek: The Original Series: The Corbomite Maneuver)

Spock is my favourite character from TOS and it is moments like this that are the reason why.

Kirk, who has been in sickbay for his physical, comes up to the bridge. The department heads report to Kirk. The cube doesn’t respond to attempts at communication and the crew can’t identify what its power source is or how it operates.

Bailey is in favour of simply firing on the cube. If it was the Borg that would be the right call but it is not that type of cube and Kirk wounderfully responds with.

I’ll keep that in mind, Mr. Bailey, when this becomes a democracy.

Kirk (Star Trek: The Original Series: The Corbomite Maneuver)

This is the first episode of the series that feels Star Treky (if I can use that word) they are encountering the unknown and it has no connection to Earth in any way. Technically Miri would be the same but that world was a duplicate of Earth – for some reason.

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We flash forward by eighteen hours. During this time the crew has been trying further analysis of the probe. Spock’s conclusion is that it is either a buoy or fly paper.

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Fly paper seems rather anachronistic, especially for Spock, but that is just nitpicking. The point is well taken though that they are being held in this place for some reason. Kirk decides it is time for action. Rather than opening fire, as Bailey assumes, he intends to pull away from it.

The Enterprise is unable to pull away and Kirk is forced to order the destruction of the cube.

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Kirk and McCoy share a drink, in the former’s quarters, while discussing the morale of the crew. Meanwhile Spock is leading battle drills as the crew was rather sluggish with responding to the threat of the cube.

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Yeoman Rand comes in with Kirk’s lunch, salad on McCoy’s orders, and Kirk expresses discontent at having a female Yeoman – which is odd considering we never see a male yeoman. For Star Trek’s frequent protestations of equality it does have a lot of problematic elements.

Kirk is soon summoned back to the bridge as the Enterprise comes into contact with the spherical Fesarius. First a cube and now a sphere – in hindsight it is hard not to think of the Borg isn’t it?

The Fesarius looks gorgeous in the remastering. They did an excellent job of updating the effects while maintaining the asphetics of the 1960s.

Reading goes of my scale, Captain. Must be a mile in diameter.

Spock (Star Trek: The Original Series: The Corbomite Maneuver)

A rather odd statement considering the Enterprise scans planets almost every week.

Everyone is mesmerised by the ship. So much so that Sulu has to operate Baliey’s console for him when Kirk orders reduced magnification.

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Kirk opens communications and the Enterprise receives a response from Commander Balok – accusing the crew of trespassing – and declaring the crew savage – this happens a lot in Star Trek!

https://www.pexels.com/photo/fire-hell-inferno-flame-9328/

He also says that for this the ship will be destroyed – this happens a lot too – aliens in Trek are very judgemental.

McCoy comes up to the bridge and informs Kirk that the message was heard all over the ship. Kirk tries to reassure his crew – it doesn’t work on Bailey who loses it – if he ever had it.

Incidentally this is one of the only pictures that came up when I searched for crazy. So Bailey is relieved of duty.

Kirk tries again to explain the Enterprise’s actions, in destroying the probe, were simply for self preservation. Balok continues the countdown.

https://www.pexels.com/photo/cards-casino-chance-chip-269630/

Kirk hits on the idea of bluffing their adversary. He says that the Enterprise contains a substance called ‘corbomite’ and that if Balok makes good on his threat his ship too will be destroyed.

Baliey returns to the bridge and resumes his post – just in time for Sulu’s ten second countdown. Balok doesn’t fire.

Kirk’s bluff has worked, after a fashion, Balok asks for proof of the Corbomite device – which Kirk has to deny of course.

A small ship emerges from the Fesarius and begins towing the Enterprise. Now the First Federation plans to maroon the crew on one of their planets and destroy the Enterprise.

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Kirk gambles that the tractor beam must be a big strain on a ship so small. He give orders to pull away from the small ship. The plan works and the Enterprise breaks free of the small ship. Balock sends a distress signal that is too weak for the flag ship to have received – Kirk decides to render aid.

https://www.pexels.com/photo/soldier-and-black-dog-cuddling-34504/

This action is why I feel this episode is very Star Trek after all that has happened Kirk is still prepared to help out a potential enemy.

I would be remiss if I didn’t point out that this behaviour is also typical of the military as we know it. When the Bismark was sunk in World War 2 the survivors were rescued by the Royal Navy.

I have tried to find a specific clip of this to put here but have been unsuccessful. I am now starting to wonder if I imagined it! The clip was a news reel from the time. It talks about the rescue of the enemy sailors and says something about the public questioning why we would help enemies – and concludes with the 1940s equivalent of ‘That’s not how we roll in the Royal Navy’ – it is a concept I have heard before that once the ship is no longer a threat the crew should be rescued – they have served their country and that demands respect.

That was rather long winded way of saying something rather simple… Star Trek often talks about humans being better than today… but it seems to ignore the good qualities we have already and seems to exaggerate how bad we are now and how good they are.

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So Kirk leads a landing party over to the ship. On arrival they see a dummy – it is this that they have been communicating with. Then we meet the real Balok – he appears to be a child (Clint Howard was only 7 when he played the part) but presumably that is just a human perception of an alien.

Balok welcomes them and offers them a drink. He explains that this has all been a test to see how they react to threats and to someone in need. He asks for someone to stay with him for company and an exchange of information. Baliey volunteers for that and the episode ends with the landing party being taken on a tour of Balok’s ship.

This is the best episode of the series so far. It has many of the elements that make Trek the show it is. It is just a shame we never hear of the First Federation again. It makes me wonder what they were up to during the Dominion War and, in general, beyond this episode.

My only criticism is that we don’t get to find out more. It would have been nice to have trimmed down the testing portion of the story and spent a bit of time learning about Balok’s people. Still what we got is a most enjoyable episode.

I just wanted to say that I have checked this post. I really have. Unfortunately my particular combination of dyslexia and dyspraxia makes it really hard for me to spot typos. Please enjoy and I’ll try not to make too many errors.

I have a Patreon page. I hope you will consider supporting this blog: https://www.patreon.com/unstableorbit

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Adulthood

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When I was young I remember being excited for receiving a delivery. While still living at home I might order a new game, or some other fun thing. Getting home from school it was great to have the box to open and a new thing to play with – somehow that excitement remains even into the ordinary.

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Now that I am still in the slow, because it is me, process of getting my home sorted I have needed to buy stuff. This has included a microwave, a mop and bucket, some cleaning chemicals, some towels, and a toilet brush. All of these ordinary things, apart from the towels, I have ordered from Amazon and yet there is still a degree of excitement for the thing’s arrival. Why is that?

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I think it is simply that the acquisition of something is inherently special. I can’t say why that would be. Perhaps it has something to do with the impact we are having in the world – is there some sort of subconscious comparison to everyone else? Do we feel better about ourselves because our microwave is nicer? Could it be that us having more stuff shows we can afford more stuff so we are doing better? If that is the case it would be weird. I frequently feel that I have too much stuff – and want to get rid of stuff.

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The next thing I need is a frying pan. My old one doesn’t work with this hob – I put it on the heat and the oven just shrugged and turned off. I guess it must be an induction hob. Amazon have 2000 results for frying pans – so it may take some time! Isn’t choice an annoying thing sometimes!

I just wanted to say that I have checked this post. I really have. Unfortunately my particular combination of dyslexia and dyspraxia makes it really hard for me to spot typos. Please enjoy and I’ll try not to make too many errors.

I have a Patreon page. I hope you will consider supporting this blog: https://www.patreon.com/unstableorbit

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