Did you ever see that Simpsons episode where Mr Burns goes to the doctor? In brief, for those that haven’t, the doctor concludes that he has everything. The episode is called ‘The Mansion Family’.
I bring this up because in the age of the internet, he said like it was invented last Thursday, it is very easy to believe you have everything.
For me the ‘everything’ is connected with my mental health. I know that there is something going on in my brain. I can’t put my finger on what it is. Like Mr Burns I wish I could be tested for everything.
Having a label for something is invaluable. If you know what’s wrong you can seek help. Without knowing it is far more difficult.
When I look up symptoms, or just see someone talking about their lived experience, it is very easy to think that you too have the same thing.
I am deliberately keeping my wording vague. It would be disingenuous of me to give myself a label that I don’t know I have. I know something is wrong. I know that, sometimes, I react to things in an odd way. Sometimes the day-to-day is hard to deal with.
The funny thing is that I feel I would do well in a crisis. For the purposes of this example I am assuming the crisis doesn’t involve swimming, public speaking, wasps, eating courgettes, being alone, being in a group, or having to watch the Star Wars squeals.
Perhaps I am being arrogant. It is just a theory. (That phrase is never going to be usable again is it?)
I operate under the delusion of control. I set myself a to-do list. (It drives me mad but that is a separate issue) So I know what it is that needs to be done. The idea is that when I have completed the list my life will be on track. The thing is it is never done. If, by some miracle, I manage to get on top of things I then start to think of the little jobs that don’t get regular attention.
If I was in a crisis that illusion would be gone. You can’t worry about housework if said house is one fire! The only priority is getting everyone out. I wonder if there a way to trick my brain into coping with life?
This post was inspired by this video.
I hope you are doing well. Thank you for reading my blog.
I just wanted to say that I have checked this post. I really have. Unfortunately my particular combination of dyslexia and dyspraxia makes it really hard for me to spot typos. Please enjoy and I’ll try not to make too many errors.
https://www.buymeacoffee.com/SDuKYJBkJm
Unstable Orbit 