Tag Archives: Confused Matthew

He’s Dead Gym

I only went to the gym once this week. Ironic as I was telling you, only two weeks ago, about how I’d been keeping up with it. Once in the week is not too bad. Let me explain why I didn’t go again. No, there is too much, let me sum up. It was a combination of wanting to write a couple of chapters beforehand and, on the other days, late shifts.

And yes there was one other thing…

Yes I discovered a new you tuber Anna Akana. She’s funny and, yes I admit it, attractive. When writing is dragging a bit its easy to get sucked into something else! Anything else. I wonder what the displacement of HMS Victory is….

So maybe I’m wasting my life. What do you care? You’re not my mother! Well one of you is.

I shall now precede with a awkward segue.

A mother is the person who takes care of you when you’re young. In other words they are a guardian.

I saw Guardians of the Galaxy on Monday. Here’s seven thoughts about it. Why seven? Wouldn’t you like to know.

  1.  It was an enjoyable film. There was good action, it was well acted, and the 3D was great. I saw Avatar in 3D and was disappointed, both by the tech of 3D and Avatar, but here the 3D was good. Even in a simple scene of characters gathered around a bed it looked like some of them were closer to you than others.
  2. Not enough Karen Gillan. I’m bound to make this observation, being British, but I think it is a real shame. She didn’t have much to do in the film as Nebula. She wasn’t even at the level of a henchman from a Bond film. There was some attempt to giver her back story with Gamora – but it wasn’t fully developed. Confused Mathew, in his review, doesn’t even mention Nebula. She was hardly needed – Is it wrong that I was attracted to her even as a sci-Borg?
  3. The back story to Star Lord is that he was abducted as a child from Earth. He listens to eighties music but, other than that, there is little to differentiate him from the human looking aliens. The film gave no explanation of why a young boy was abducted. To me there was no point in this plot point. I know there are comics but I have to approach this just from the film. The film gave no explanation and I haven’t read the comics.
  4. Cliche plot – bad guy wants to destroy stuff. There is a muguffin that will help him do this and the good guys have to stop him getting it. However his full motivations aren’t satisfactorily explored.
  5. Helpless guards. This isn’t a nitpick and isn’t really worth mentioning but I want to. During the escape the good guys attack the prison guards. These guards are innocents. They don’t know what’s going on they’re just doing their jobs. It seems ridiculous, when we’re supposed to be rooting for the guardians, that they are indiscriminately killing the guards.
  6. Groot only says ‘I am Groot’ I got the impression they were trying to make him into a Chewbacca-ish character. Although he only said three words his friend, Rocket, understood what he meant and that really worked.
  7. While this film won’t win any awards for the story it was enjoyable. I look forward to seeing the next one but its not a desperate can’t wait feeling. Its more like ‘Whenever you’re ready. I have time.’
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May the Fourth Be With You

Today is Star Wars day. So I thought I’d engage in some more flogging of a dead horse. Yes, as you’ve guessed, this post will be about the prequels. Episodes 1, 2, and 3 have been repeatedly flogged. There is no point in me going over old ground on that. You can watch the Confused Matthew or Redlettermedia reviews. A word of warning Confused Mathew is very angry and Redlettermedia is… disturbing.

Unless you’ve spent the last few years frozen in carbonite you’ll know the problems with these films. Instead I thought I’d offer a few suggestions of what could have been done instead. The original trilogy mentioned very little of what came before – leaving Lucas with very little that had to be included.

One

I think the film(s) should have focused on the relationship between Anakin and Obi-wan. Perhaps it could start shortly after Obi-wan became a Jedi Master. Slowly we would see Anakin slide into darkness. This could start with Anakin going a little too far in an interrogation – leading further and further to the dark side. Its not hard to see how a good man might turn bad. Just think of the old philosophical problem with the runaway train: Do nothing and three people die – do something and one person dies. Anakin would become more and more disillusioned with the Jedi ways. The ends justify the means would be how he justifies himself.

Two

Redlettermedia has an excellent suggestion in his Revenge of the Sith review. The republic is attacked by unknown forces, clones, and the individual militaries are unable to withstand the assaults. In response the Chancellor decides to create an army for the republic.  Obi-wan and Anakin begin to investigate and discover that the Chancellor is playing both sides. He created the war as a grab for power.

Three

In episode one we are introduced to Naboo. My question why not call it Alderaan? It would only have required a find and replace and would have given a wonderful poignancy every time it was mentioned.

Those are just a few little thoughts. I’m sure there’s more but I want to post this today!

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