
Today (2019-10-05) I didn’t leave the flat. I am trying to decide if this is a good thing, a bad thing, or a neutral thing. It is bad from an exercise point of view that is for sure. I have taken less than 1000 steps so that is not so good – but I have got some stuff down – it is not like I have been binge watching TV.

I resisted the temptation to have a takeaway. Instead I had some soup and garlic bread for tea. So I am still not doing well on the caloric intake. Overall though I have been productive and that is something for the win column – even if, once again, I am realising I am trying to do more stuff than I have time for.
Cannot run out of time. You are finite. Zathras is finite.
Zathras (Babylon 5: War Without End Part 2)
I know I am going round in circles having talked about this before. Which I suppose means that I am not making much headway. One thing I have done is book a holiday. It is not till next year but I am going to Amsterdam.

I have a bucket list book which I am writing in every so often. Most of what I want to do is to travel – so it is long past time that I started to do that. I have never been abroad by myself before. The Netherlands seems like a good place to start. I can fly from Cardiff for one thing – and maybe I will go to Belgium too as it is not too far from Amsterdam.

That is the plan for next year – and I hope to go abroad every other year at least – in theory I can afford that – money is the only barrier now.
For my day-to-day life I have no idea how to work things out. I have no idea how to balance all that I need to do with all that I want to do. All I can do is to keep trying to figure things out and battle the terrible feelings when they arise.
I hope you are well and happy and I will be back next week.
I just wanted to say that I have checked this post. I really have. Unfortunately my particular combination of dyslexia and dyspraxia makes it really hard for me to spot typos. Please enjoy and I’ll try not to make too many errors.
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