2014-11-02 · 18:39

Welsh, Writing and Spoilers

This is a blog in three parts. The parts are unrelated but I have three little things I want to say.

Part 1

I’ve been saying it for months but I’ve finally started to learn Welsh. I’m using Say Something in Welsh as a starting point. Will I ever be fluent? I don’t know.

I did Welsh is school but it was badly taught. It seems now that we learned a combination of overly formal language, and sentences that actually don’t make sense. One sentence we learned was: ‘Rwy’n hoffi Star Trek achos mae’n da.’ – Which means I like Star Trek because its good. Obviously we put our own like, or dislike, in it. We also learned to say that we didn’t like stuff because it was bad.

Why we learned these useless sentences I don’t know.

Some say that learning Welsh is a pointless endeavor. They argue that everyone who speaks Welsh speaks English. Its difficult to explain why I want to lean Welsh. A part of me is tempted to answer the question with: ‘If you have to ask you’ll never understand.’

I do feel a connection to Welsh and want to speak it. Without delving too much into the history it feels like its the language I should be speaking.

How long I’ll keep at it is another question.

Part 2

Its November now, you may have noticed, and for many, well some, it means NaNoWriMo. NaNoWriMo is an acronym for: National Novel Writing Month. In which the aim is to write 50,000 words in a month. A tall order to be sure.

I’m not doing this in the ‘right’ way, as large chunks of my novel are written, but I am going to try and write more this month.

Will I finish my novel? If my previous track record is anything to go by the answer is no.

Part 3

Finally I wanted to talk about spoilers. In particular I wanted to talk about Doctor Who. At the end of each episode they have a ‘Next Time’ segment and my question is: Why?

Doctor Who is one of the most popular shows on TV at the moment. It has a guaranteed audience. There is simply no need to tempt views to watch they will be their.

This was especially irritating in the last episode: Dark Water. The villain (click here for the revel) is hinted at, take a look at the doors, and its reveled in a great way. However the effort of the writer to hint at this is ruined by it being shown in the next time segment!

If anyone from the BBC happens to stumble on to this please jettison ‘Next Time.’ We don’t need it. This series has been a mixed bag but on the whole I’ve enjoyed it. To make sure I see the next episode all I need is six words ‘The Doctor will return next week.’ – basically just tell me it exists and I’ll be there!

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2014-10-26 · 18:28

Designing a World

A while ago I had a conversation with a friend about world building. We discussed whether the world should come first or the story. We basically deiced that both ways have merit.

Let’s start off with a premise: A group of extremists break in to a school and hold the teachers and students captive. The school is attended by the children of important people. All of the parents are: ambassadors, politicians, CEOs, news executives, Generals, Admirals, Air Marshals, and so on.

That premise could be used in a story set today. It could be set in the far future. It could be a world of magic. What the world is like would dictate how the situation is dealt with.

If we were in a science fiction setting what would be the solution? Just beam the hostages out? That would be a very short and boring book. So maybe transports don’t exist – or perhaps the terrorists have an anti-transporter device.

If the would is designed first then you have limiters built in. You know what the characters are prepared to do and you know what technology will allowed them to do. Are the terrorists really prepared to kill children to get what they want? Or is it a bluff? Will the negotiator (perhaps an FBI agent) decided to pump gas in to knock everyone out – risking everyone’s lives? Perhaps there is a completely safe anesthetic  and the story then is about how to get close enough to deploy it.

It can be interesting to write with limitations. You can start with the school. Its built on an island. It has a group of five attack helicopters and a contingent of Royal Marines. Then you have to decided how the terrorists overcame this. Was their an insider?

If the story is designed first all parts of the story can be decided – pretty much as you go along. You might deiced from the get go that two children will die but the others will be saved. This method might require a lot of reworking. It’s important to beware of logical hiccups.

I’ve already alluded to Star Trek and it is an example of the world being designed first. I.e the transporters were there from the beginning and so were a staple for every episode. However if you could just beam captured crew aboard at any time it wouldn’t be dramatic. Therefore the transport can’t work in certain conditions. Arguably it would have been better not to have transporters. It starts to look silly if they can’t be used too often.

In my own science fiction I’ve tried to develop the world first. I’ve hit a bit of brick wall. Looking at current technologies its possible that something akin to an Avatar might be possible. Not a blue skinned critter but a mechanical device. We already have the technology to control bionic arms across the room – requiring an implant. So give it 1000 years and you could send avatars, robot like devices, down to a planet. These would be controlled from the ship. If anything goes wrong you’ve only lost hardware and not people.

This could create a story problem as the crew are never actually at risk. It is tempting to change the world of the story. I could invent a reason why this technology doesn’t exist. However I feel it is somewhat more interesting to decided that the technology does exist. Doing that means I have to be more creative. I have to work to bring in tension. Also having these devices sets it apart from Star Trek. In Star Trek they go down to planets with nothing but a phaser and a tricorder.

***

Would consoles explode? No. Okay I can’t say that for sure. I’ve decided though that consoles won’t explode. I love Star Trek but that’s just silly. A few sparks maybe – so perhaps a few electrical burns – but not a toss you across the room explosion!

I understand why they do explode like that. It gives tension to the bridge scenes. In reality the bridge of a starship would be deep inside the ship. The ship would probably shake but not much more than that.

I’m a writer not a physicist.

Deciding that the consoles won’t explode does beg the question of how to make battles exciting. I guess that is my challenge.

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2014-10-19 · 21:52

Not What it Seems

As you know I’m a member of a gym. The gym in question is about a 30 minute train journey away. It seemed like a logical choice. I already have a monthly train ticket, because of work, so the train fare wasn’t an issue. I figured I’d go on my days off and one day after work. However… my job involves standing up all the time… therefore I don’t usually feel like going after work. On my days off it feels like quite a rigmarole going all that way.

The solution is obvious – find a gym closer to home. I did my googgling and found one.  It was £3.20 for one session and only a 15 minute walk. The website looked most professional. They offer membership and have ‘superb facilities including locker rooms’

They do not…

Basically this gym was just a room with some equipment. I suppose technically that describes all gyms of this type. However I was expecting a lot more from what the website said. The equipment was a little on the dirty side, it needed dusting (so does my flat but that’s a separate issue), and there weren’t locker rooms. There were lockers on a landing with three showers.

Maybe I was expecting too much. That is certainly a possibility but the gym I go to in Cardiff is cheaper than this little place. Also the showers actually drain and you don’t end up standing in a good few inches of water.

I guess it just goes to show that anyone can make a good website.

So for now I’ll stick with the large gym in town. At least I can read on the train.

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2014-10-12 · 22:43

Sunday

Today was a nice day.

I allowed myself to do nothing. I then felt guilty about it.

Having worked the late shift on Saturday I got up rather late today.  I decided to go into town. Cardiff Farmer’s Market is on on Sundays. It was great to see so many people there and sample the lovely food. If you live in Cardiff its well worth a visit.

After the market I went to Starbucks, then the gym,  and then Starbucks again on account of missing my train.

So I’ve supported the little guy and a multinational corporation – swings and roundabouts.

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2014-10-05 · 16:38

Fiction Within Fiction#2

Several weeks ago I talked about the lack of fiction within fictional works. Click here for the original. Now I’ve come to the conclusion that thinking of fiction within fiction is even more useful than I first thought. The reason: copyright.

I’ve tried to wrap my head around what is and isn’t allowed when it comes to copyright. There seems to be a disconnect between what is legal and what people have actually been cautioned for. Obviously uploading entire episodes of a series is illegal but reviews should be legal.

In my novel I want to reference various works of fiction. It seems so natural to me. If a character finds herself on a starship, or finds out magic exists, she is almost certainly going to talk about the fiction she knows. If someone told you that you have magical powers might you be tempted to say: “Hogwarts here I come!” or maybe refer to your mentor as “Gandalf” now and again.

These are the sorts of things I want to do. I thought of having the wizard say “You know its not too late. You can take the blue pill.” – meaning that my protagonist is given the option to forget she has magic and go back to her life.

I still can’t get my head round what is allowed. Does The Big Bang Theory, for instance, have to ask permission for every reference they make? Do they have to pay Sci-fi (I refuse to use their new spelling) whenever a character says ‘frak’?

I have no idea. This difficulty has lead to an interesting opportunity. I can use my novel as a proving ground for new ideas. Instead of the characters watching real shows they watch things I’ve made up. The particular favorite is a show called Guardians of Kronos.

Guardians of Kronos follows Sian Fry. Her job is to maintain the integrity of the space/time continuum as aliens attempt to disrupt history. Inventing concepts and characters is always fun. Its nice to be able to do it without having to work out all the ins and outs.

I did have one other idea which was to use Galaxy Quest; but to use it as a real show. I.e. In this universe. we have Galaxy Quest, Galaxy Quest: The Second Generation, Galaxy Quest: Babylon 9, Galaxy Quest: Valiant, and Galaxy Quest: Protector – and there was also a 1999 film spoof about this successful franchise….

….

A spoof called Star Trek….

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2014-09-28 · 22:37

Reviews

If you’ve ever read reviews of, well anything, you’ll know it can be a futile experience. Sometimes there are equal numbers of positive reviews as negative reviews. By the end of it you’re as confused as when you started. This is frustrating but it can be great for a writer.

It’s great because whatever we write someone will like it. At the very least we hope someone will like it. In one of my creative writing classes we were given a list of story titles. We were asked to say which of them we’d most like to read. Everyone was interested in a different story. This might seem a rather trite thing but it was useful.

I remember picking out Memories of the Space Age as the one I was most interested in. Though I haven’t read it yet – which I suppose rather undermines my point. It sounded so interesting because it suggested a post apocalyptic world.

The point of all this is simple. Everything has an audience. It still has to follow the basic rules of a story but no matter where you set it, or when, you’ll find someone who likes it.

And if all else fails…

You can just pretend that the cuddly duck, that you’ve had since childhood, really really likes it.

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2014-09-21 · 10:00

One Hundred

This is my one hundredth post on this site. So I’ve been bringing you poorly edited stuff for quite a while now! In all seriousness I do edit and proofread but something is always missed. Its a lot easier to notice mistakes made by others than it is ones you’ve made.

My novel, Rolling Shadows, is going well. This novel has been altered to within an inch of its life. If I was writing on paper I would have got through a small forest. Nothing has really been deleted in the processing of the novel but I am confused. I start to wonder if a particular fact was in the current draft or the previous draft.

The common wisdom is that on finishing a novel you should stick it in a draw for a few months. This enables you to forget all the story paths you didn’t take. You also need an editor who can point out all the story flaws. I try to be aware of these flaws because I like to nitpick. I try to think critically about what I’m writing. I want to find the flaws and fix them to deprive a review of saying how stupid I was.

One of the hardest potential flaws to detect is implication. This is when you give your character or star ship some ability and, without realising it, you imply another ability. An example of this would be Star Trek with its transporters and torpedoes. I assume you can see where I’m going with this. Yet it wasn’t until Dark Frontier that that was shown. Even then it didn’t become a standard tactic. It seems to me that that could, even should, be their standard tactic. Weaken the shields enough to beam a torpedo aboard and then boom.

This is even more difficult when dealing with magic. Where are the limits? In the Harry Potter series glasses can be fixed with a spell but not, apparently, eyes. Obviously eyes are far more complicated but couldn’t you conjure up something like contact lens?

There is no answer. My advice to anyone reading over their own work is to pretend its written by someone you don’t like. That way you might be more critical. I know that if Doctor Who does something stupid I’ll forgive it. Doctor Who is British, made in Cardiff no less, so I forgive its foibles. However if its a show I’m ambivalent towards, or even don’t like, I’ll use it as one more reason to hate it. I’m irrational that way.

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2014-09-14 · 23:33

Scottish Independence

On Thursday the Scottish people vote on whether to become an independent state. Living in Wales, and to my shame never having visited Scotland, this will have little effect on me. Whichever way this goes I think the fact that the SNP is even calling for this referendum says a lot. Even if Scotland remains a part of the UK I think this may be the start of some big political changes. Like I said I don’t get a vote – if Wales had the option to be independent I would vote yes.

The political system in the UK is problematic. Often times, assuming we vote at all, we vote simply for the party we hate the least. I know who I’m voting for next election – its not exactly the party I want but I’m voting for them so the party I absolutely don’t want doesn’t get in. It feels like being a starving man and only having the choice of food that will kill you or food that will make you ill.

I have heard it suggested that England should have its own Parliament. This would be a very good idea. At the moment Welsh, Northern Irish, and Scottish MPs vote on devolved issues. In essence my local MP votes on legislation which won’t effect his constituents because its handled by the Welsh Assembly. An England Parliament would do much to make the countries in the UK seem more equal. Without a separate English Parliament England feels, paradoxically, both about and, arguably, below the rest of the UK.

Since the referendum was announced people have come out as ‘Yes’ or ‘No’. Some elements of the ‘No’ campaign have seemed really silly. The government have offered more powers to the Scottish parliament if they stay – but if they go they get them anyway.  Also I saw that Barack Obama said that Scotland should remain, or words to that effect, which seems a bit rich for the President of a country that celebrates its independence every year. It makes me wonder what would have happen, back in the 1700s, if George III had offered the Americans representation in Parliament.

So in a few days we’ll know. As I said whichever way this goes I think big changes are afoot.

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2014-09-07 · 22:46

My Imagination

Klingons have ridges and Cardassians have spoons. A lot of aliens don’t even have that. The Centauri only look alien because their entire population, at least the men, have had bad dreams. Unless you factor in their… high numerical value… there isn’t much difference. The reason for this is obvious, casting persons are limited to hiring humans. A trip out of the solar system is a little beyond the budget of most television programs.

Actors like Andreas Katsulas do a great job in presenting alien characters. CGI just wasn’t up to the task back then. Even today it struggles with presenting characters. I don’t need to say the name do I? The film, the infamous film, and its sequels? It will remain nameless, was released 15 years ago. 15 years ago! Goodness me I’m old! I’m old enough, or rather was young enough at the time, to actually think the film was good.

Real actors are therefore the way to go. Film makers though are stuck between a rock and a hard place. I apologise to my writing teachers for employing a cliche – but damn it it’s true. Film makes either have an actor in prosthetics or fake looking CGi.

Consider the Gorn. In Arena the Gorn was played by a man in a suit and in In a Mirror Darkly Part II it was CGI – it is arguable which is worse.

I’ve just been reading Doors into Chaos, the third book in the Gateways series, and featuring the Gorn. I found it hard to imagine them. I kept seeing the CGI blob of their Enterprise appearance and not the ‘real’ creature. Perhaps this is understandable as I’m dealing with a creature I know from TV. However this seems to happen to me even when it is an entirely original piece of work. Yes, I think my mind is defective. When I try to imagine an alien in a novel my mind seems to bring up what it would look like if it was having to be put together for a film – stupid brain.

Sometimes I wounder if having humanoid aliens isn’t the best choice – even in books. If you have an alien that is very different from humans it is difficult to keep track of. You might be left thinking ‘Are they the ones with twelve tentacles or the ones with eighteen fingers the size of cocktail sausages.’ Maybe I just have a short… squirrel.

I’ve used that joke before. I don’t think it was funny then either.

From a story perspective aliens have to have some connection to humans. If we are too different, biologically, culturally, technologically, then there would be little or no interaction. If the aliens require arsenic to live we’re probably not going to enter into a dispute over planet everything-here-can-kill-you. Unless arsenic is of use to us in someway I don’t know – I don’t know a lot of things.

I was going to end with a great quote. It’s late and this is not a university essay so I’m not going to worry too much about exactitude. I’m going to attribute the quote to Dyson, not the vacuum cleaner man, the physicists. The quote is this:  ‘Intelligent aliens may not only be stranger than we imagine; they may be stranger than we can imagine.’

Goodnight.

or

Morning.

or

Afternoon.

I don’t know where you live so it could be any.

Good day.

Bye.

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2014-08-31 · 22:28

The Prom

As promised The Prom is now up. How you enjoy it. Please click here.

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